Last film you saw, vol. 6

[TazzMission]

Originally Posted by Space Cop

The Godfather (1972)

"In Sicily, women are more dangerous than shotguns."

The Godfather Part II (1974)

"If history has taught us anything, it is that you can kill anyone."



Well, neither of those are films, but at least they allow me a spot to post some more movies.

Imo they should merge tv and film into one thread.

[Space Cop]

The Way of the Dragon (1972)

"In this world of guns and knives, wherever Tang Lung may go to, he will always travel on his own."

Daggers 8 (1980)

"I've still got a few more. Should I take my pants off as well?
-No need."

Occupation (2018)

"So what's the plan?
-Create a diversion, rescue your friends, save the f***ing planet."

An okay B flick about a small Australian town during an alien invasion. As others noted, it's basically Red Dawn with aliens.

Originally Posted by TazzMission

Imo they should merge tv and film into one thread.

Well, I suppose you/we can since neither thread is as popular as they used to be and I don't think the mods are going to crack down on something like that. [And it's not my thread. I just happen to post here more than anyone else (apparently more than the rest of the board combined now).]

[Agent Purple]

MST3K: The Terror from the Year 5000 (1958)

"It's the Shroud of Suzanne Summers!"

"And he likes to dress in men's clothes!"

Didn't have a film to watch on hand as usual, so once more took to YouTube to save my bacon at my dad's. I had wanted to watch Prince of Space but decided this film's title was more appealing (and meant it would be even wilder as an episode). We weren't disappointed.

A scientist and his brash non-scientist assistant are running experiments and eventually summon a small statue which they send to a museum curator the scientist knows. The statue is carbon dated (because that was the hot new thing then) to not exist for another three thousand years. This compels the curator to visit the lab where the assistant pushes things too far and summons another being from the future, which proceeds to cause havoc.

I won't lie, the basic idea of the film is good, time travel and temporal manipulation in general and the compounding ramifications of radiation on both man and nature, but the execution is once again heavily flawed (cliched writing mostly, but some of the performances are honestly not bad). The film also suffers in pushing the hell out of the love triangle, because the scientist's daughter is engaged to the assistant (even though he's a colossal dickhead the entire time we see him) but she is, for example, seated next to the curator in one scene and not her fiance, which is absurd beyond the realm of foreshadowing. There's also the pervy old groundskeeper angle, which is just dumb and I suppose the writers did that to both spice up the film/pad the run time and to make the audience feel less awful about him getting killed by the monster.

And as for the monster, she's an interesting sort. A disfigured woman, one of many in future leper colonies the normal people created to exile those born with radiation mutations. She needs fresh genetics to course correct her people but of course, the writers pushed a sketchy angle (she hypnotizes the assistant while exposition takes place, which the daughter points out as being dishonest and a sign she's evil). But that's just bad writing because we already see her bad blood, we see a dead mutated cat, so why demonize an innocent woman as a she-monster and lose focus of the film warning of unchecked scientific fallout? Because it's a 1950s monster flick just as much as it is a narrow-focus sci-fi flick. While the riffing by Mike and the Bots is hilarious, this is in my eyes just a moderately less entertaining This Island Earth: not a bad film but not a particularly great one, just okay at best.

But my dad did bust a gut at those two quoted jokes, and I got some good laughs too. Definitely worth checking out.

[Space Cop]

G.I. Joe Retaliation (2013)

"Drive it like you stole it!
-As your good friend, you need a new catchphrase."

[Rifftrax:] Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009/2011)

"Harry Potter terms that sound absolutely filthy in isolation: parseltongue, splinching, Nimbus, Barty Crouch, Chocoballs, Griphook, Bagshot ..."

[Rifftrax:] Superargo and the Faceless Giants (1968/2016)

"Middle-School Gym Class: The Motion Picture."

Originally Posted by Agent Purple

MST3K: The Terror from the Year 5000 (1958) . . .
Didn't have a film to watch on hand as usual, so once more took to YouTube to save my bacon at my dad's. I had wanted to watch Prince of Space but decided this film's title was more appealing (and meant it would be even wilder as an episode). We weren't disappointed. . .

I know this makes me a fanboy, but I seriously don't dislike any MST3K episode. Even the weakest (for me, the early public-access ones) have some pretty funny bits and the riffs make even the films that would be unwatchable on their own (Red Zone Cuba; Robot Monster; Manos) well worth it. IMO, they got better (faster paced and more tightly written) as they went on, but the early stuff is worth it too.

[TazzMission]

Man the expanse is amazing. Anyone who likes sci-fi really should check it out. About to start season 4. Season 5 is currently airing on Amazon. This is probably the closest ill get to a live action Mass effect series

[Space Cop]

Scarface (1983)

"Nothing exceeds like excess."

I over watch this (especially considering the number of movies I own and have yet to watch at all), but have been wanting to see it again since late October and held off until now.

Dead End Drive-In (1986)

"This is a slum! Even with only a few people, it'd still be a slum."

Virus (1999)

"This is very stupid."

[Agent Purple]

That reminds me, I still need to watch Brandon Tenold's review of Virus.

[Space Cop]

The Toxic Avenger Part II (1989)

"At first I found it hard to believe that my father was Japanese, and that I was part-Japanese. But that would explain why I've always had these strange, non-American urges to work very hard, save money, and live without credit cards."

Justice League: Doom (2012)

"That's three you owe me.
-We keeping score?
Not literally.
-Because if we are, it's 8 to 7, my favor."

The Beastmaster (1982)

"All pilgrims share a deep love of life; especially their own!"

So, watched this in honor of Tonya Roberts only to hear half way through she's alive. So, I guess now it's well wishes for her recovery.

Originally Posted by Agent Purple

That reminds me, I still need to watch Brandon Tenold's review of Virus.

That's what sparked the Netflix rental. Apparently Jamie Lee Curtis called it “a piece of s**t” and “just the worst from top to bottom,” but I’d say it’s just a B movie. It’s not exactly good, but I’ve seen much worse and I wasn’t really bored.

[Agent Purple]

Originally Posted by Space Cop

That's what sparked the Netflix rental. Apparently called Jamie Lee Curtis it “a piece of s**t” and “just the worst from top to bottom,” but I’d say it’s just a B movie. It’s not exactly good, but I’ve seen much worse and I wasn’t really bored.

I remember watching it years ago and thinking it was relatively good. Not great but better than I thought it would be. I still haven't had time to watch Tenold's video, perhaps this weekend.

[Space Cop]

The White Sheik (1952)

"Real life is the life of dreams."

Fellini's first feature solo directing. A minor character (Cabiri) played by his wife would also get a spin-off feature of her own five years later. Pretty good though very light.

War of the Worlds (1953)

"After all that men could do had failed, the Martians were destroyed and humanity was saved by the littlest things, which God, in His wisdom, had put upon this Earth."

A Serious Man (2009)

"The Uncertainty Principle. It proves we can't ever really know... what's going on. So it shouldn't bother you. Not being able to figure anything out. Although you will be responsible for this on the mid-term."

A pretty-good, but not the best flick from the Coen brothers. Just about a physics professor in 1967 who is very put-upon by life and seeking advice from his rabbis.

[Agent Purple]

Danger Dolls (2014)

(I have no quote since the entire film was in Japanese)

A squad of female assassins investigates and takes down targets who do not seem entirely human, since they are actually from another dimension. As their hunt continues, the truth is gradually discovered.

So according to Wikipedia, the main setting is a parallel world where nuclear weapons have long been outlawed and "brilliant leader" George W. Bush eliminated firearms. I still think it would have been fairly easy to just make the world still have these since it's got tough girls kicking ass and audiences don't really care if they shred through dudes with guns or swords, but whatever. Things were difficult to understand fully since there was no English but the fights were fairly good.

And then I made my dad watch an SNL parody of the Twilight Zone classic "Nightmare at 20,000 Feet" and it was a gem.

[Space Cop]

Doomed! The Untold Story of Roger Corman's Fantastic Four (2016)

"I head 'you know this film was never really intended to be a film.' That infuriated me. I said, 'Oh, yeah? You watch!'"

Very good. Really showed how the movie's status as not intended to be released was more on an upper level (and perhaps even then a late decision) and how the people who actually made it were trying their best with next to nothing.

Scanners (1981)

"You're one of me?"

40th anniversary.

[TazzMission]

Wandavision episode's 1 and 2. Its weird but i dig it. Im sure the die hard comic readers will know all the easter eggs.

[Space Cop]

Wrestling Isn't Wrestling (2015)

"Wrestling is melodrama. Wrestling is mythology. Wrestling is action. Wrestling is comic books. The only thing wrestling isn't is wrestling."

Max Landis' very fun short film explaining why professional wrestling is entertaining and using almost all female actors to quickly tell the story of HHH. Free on Youtube.

Stereo (1969)

"Now that we have some insight into the concept of experiential space, we may consider interaction among the experiential space continua of a highly unique group of individuals."

Cronenberg's feature debut (though it's only 64 minutes). Actually has no proper soundtrack. Instead, it has a narrator reading clinical reports as a future experiment with psychics is shown. Alright, but very slow. Only recommend for Cronenberg fans or art film fans.

[Agent Purple]

MST3K: Riding with Death (1976)

"He had to wear his sister's pants today."

My dad put on the Invasion of the Neptune Men episode at first because he was randomly watching episodes and liked the Vietnam battle parody in Mike's eyelashes, but I wanted to watch this episode since I somewhat remembered it as a kid and couldn't recall the entire thing. It's pretty weak even though some parts really aren't that bad and really only needed a mild revision of the script. The idea of a secret agent who needs a special device to become visible is actually a decent twist of the usual invisibility formula and some of the stunt work and explosions are good (the runaway truck scene was rather well performed for getting two semis together like that).

I also liked Pearl and Company as embattled soldiers.

[Space Cop]

The Kid (1921)

"A picture with a smile - and perhaps, a tear."

Centennial of this one, largely regarded as one of Chaplin's best (and also Jackie Coogan's first credited film).

The Toxic Avenger Part III: The Last Temptation of Toxie (1990)

"I don't have a life. I have a half-life."

[Agent Purple]

MST3K: Track of the Moon Beast (1976)

"I'd like a wheat penny and a Glock."

From one of the co-creators of Batman, Bill Finger, comes a not-very-riveting tale of PAUL!!! turning into a horribly-cheap imitation of the Gorn beast from the 1960s Star Trek series. Some of the jokes in here are solid but the writers had to probably work their asses off because, as Pearl puts it, "It stars no one and is about nothing." The good news is I was scrolling through the comments and saw the gang riffed some other flicks I forgot about, like Overdrawn at the Memory Bank, Diabolik, and a couple others I have to find time to watch now.

The best jokes in this episode by far were the Behind the Music parody about the folk rock band and the bots spying in Mike.

[Space Cop]

Rear Window (1954)

"Yeah, can't you just see me, rushing home to a hot apartment to listen to the automatic laundry and the electric dishwasher and the garbage disposal and the nagging wife...
-Jeff, wives don't nag anymore. They discuss.
Oh, is that so, is that so? Well, maybe in the high-rent district they discuss. In my neighborhood they still nag."

[Rifftrax:] Mortal Kombat (1995/2020)

"China’s Temple of Light—conveniently located in Thailand."

Originally Posted by Agent Purple

...The good news is I was scrolling through the comments and saw the gang riffed some other flicks I forgot about, like Overdrawn at the Memory Bank...

That's a good one. The film itself is goofy fun, but the writing/pace on MST3K that late was very tight and funny.

[Agent Purple]

I will never forget Crow shouting "THIS is how much cocaine you need to enjoy the movie!" during that riff.

[Space Cop]

Fascism on a Thread: The Strange Story of Nazisploitation Cinema (2020)

"It's the right of art to exist. . . We can't just lock them away. . . We won't learn anything until we actually put it out there."

From Dusk Till Dawn (1996)

"So, what, were they psychos, or...
-Did they look like psychos? Is that what they looked like? They were vampires. Psychos do not explode when sunlight hits them, I don't give a f**k how crazy they are!"

25th anniversary.

[TazzMission]

Final season of chilling adventures of sabrina. They ended it nicely. Now time to finish The expanse and start the boys

[Space Cop]

[Rifftrax:] Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 (2010/2013)

"These people can’t even read a simple invoice without going all Bippity Boppity Boo."

Pretty Baby (1978)

"I have no time for hate or love."

[Trey Strain]

For fans of Basil Rathbone. The man who drew this is a terrific artist and should be working in comics.

https://www.deviantart.com/bielebny/art/--867697139

[Space Cop]

American Assassin (2017)

"Patriotism exists because people like and people like me need a higher cause."

Run-of-the mill flick where a victim of terrorists gets recruited by the CIA (and trained by Michael Keaton) while on a revenge kick. Expiring soon on Instant Netflix.

In Search of Darkness (2019)

"I always think that horror movies are very healthy because they're a way of taking those fears and exorcising them, in a way, from your system."

Ordered this as a double pack when I pre-ordered (crowd funding) ISoD 2 and watched it last night with a friend who's also an 80s horror fan. Despite being over 4 hours, we decided to watch the whole thing and liked it.

[Agent Purple]

MST3K: Diabolik (1968)

"He loves her so much he bought her a walk-in diamond."

"Dr. Phibes is drunk again."

I knew I had seen this ages ago when it aired, but I forgot most of it including the ending of both the film and the series. I spent the episode wondering what dumb twist would send Mike and the Bots back into orbit but no, they really arrive on Earth and Pearl, Bobo and Brain Guy move on.

The film itself wasn't terrible. I was stunned to see Mario Bava had directed and that Dino de Laurentiis was the producer. I do like the idea of an over-the-top crime caper where a dude who's basically Batman engages in a series of high-profile thefts and a clever senior officer tries to capture him, while the regular organized criminals are attempting to save their own asses. The film really deserves a limited-series TV reboot.